Choose Your Own Happy Ending
Have you ever had the evening arrive, exhausted from the day, and you just call it quits? You don’t stop to do anything fun. You don’t go out in a blaze of glory, hear a resounding bang of the office door, or truly feel “off.” Worse, do you find yourself staying up later than “necessary,” doing “nothing,” and feel less in love with your alarm clock with each passing day?
I’ve had plenty of days where I chanted “make it stop, make it stop, this day has to end soon” all day, and yet when it finally stopped, I fizzled out with no real sense of satisfaction. This week I’m doing something different!
Choosing My Happy Ending
I’ve decided that like thinking ahead to have food in the fridge, or prioritizing my work before starting it, there’s a way to predetermine the way my days will end. I’m going to chose a happy ending for myself. I’ve pre-determined something for each day this week that I will do — not as a reward contingent on completing a task, but rather as a reward and conclusion for completing my day.
So this week, I’ve picked something happy to do whenever my day ends. It gives me something to look forward to — something that stops me from fizzling out.
Why we Fizzle Out
I believe that when we fizzle out, it’s because we are leaving work not going to something else. Just leaving something draining isn’t nearly as fulfilling or energizing as going toward something exciting.
Better than Rewards
In the past, I’ve attempted something similar; planning rewards for “winning” or completing an important task or project. Unfortunately, I ran into a half dozen problem with rewards. And more often than not, because I would just work as hard as I could, trying to finish, the finish line would often occur at an unpredictable moment – sometimes even an unpredictable day. That unpredictability often resulted in being unable to actually have or enjoy my reward.
The thing about a happy ending is that the only thing it is attached to is the clock on the wall, the rise and fall of the sun, the dinner bell. It bypasses the part of ourselves that can become hyper critical, perfectionist, or downright overwhelmed.
Benefits of Pick an Ending:
- It gives closure to the day.
- Clears fresh head space for tomorrow.
- Replenishes your emotional energy and lengthens your “fuse.”
- Can help you be more connected to people.
- Breaks up the relentlessness of the week.
- Provides valuable anticipation to energize your work day.
- Sets a good example for the people in your life to replenish their energy.
Just as going on a trip or enjoying a distinct event can help make a time of your life stand out vividly in your memory, picking your ending for the day will help time have pulsing punctuation. You’ll know your day is done. It sweeps the cutting room floor clean, providing the perfect environment to truly succeed tomorrow.
An Example…
I’ve been finding some value in sharing my personal, specific action plans with friends and family lately. So if you’re interested, here’s my “Happy Map” for this week – the happy endings I picked for myself.
Monday: Fun Reading by the Pool
Tuesday: Dinner with Ann
Wednesday: Re-Pot my House Plants
Thursday: Movie with Lauren
Friday: Dinner with Nick
Saturday: Catch up on Chicago PD
Happy For the Whole Family
When work stress is at its peak, the emotional energy we have can be taxed, stretched, and drained for every member of the family. Deadlines looming for a project can sap family conversations of the patience, openness, and consideration we want them to have. If you want to give your family a valuable gift (whether you’re a parent of young children, or grown child in a mature family), invest in your emotional energy. Recharge it every day to stay resilient and kind with your family members. (To get ideas for Capturing Magic Moments with your kids, read our recent guest blog by Audrey Moralez.)
Waiting for the Weekend
If the weekend feels way too far away, take 5 minutes to pick a happy ending for every day for the rest of this week. Pick some activites that make you Laugh out Loud. And please, would you let me know how it goes? I’d love to hear if this works for you!